I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
