how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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