Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
