My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
