College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
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