Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
