sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
i need an iv and a liver transplant
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
I have fence marks all over my body
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
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