hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
