Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Randomize
