he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
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