Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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