I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize
