I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
