she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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