It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Randomize
