Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
These tits shall not be calmed
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
