You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
