office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
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