I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Randomize