FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Randomize
