Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
