Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
