He is an equal opportunity slut.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize
