Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Randomize
