well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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