Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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