his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
