brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
