Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I looked at my own cervix.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
You pole danced in your parka.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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