If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
