i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
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