Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
