During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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