I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Randomize
