So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
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