I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
