Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
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