I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
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