he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
