I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
I am midnight drunk by noon
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
jump out the window naked night went bad
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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