I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
