Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
I need to stop coming to work sober
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
