Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
okay pat passed out under dana's car
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
Randomize
