3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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