Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Randomize
