Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
