we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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