For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
