i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
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