You're a womanizer and a bitch.
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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