All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
